Mass Effect 3 Rant - Cause Everyone Else is Doing It

There has been a lot of talk about Mass Effect 3, from its pre-release fears of broad appeal and rushed development, to anger at the prospects of Day One DLC with facts pointing to large portions of said content already on the disc, and finally to the soul-crushingly poor ending that has turned an entire community against a single company and its creative decision. I wanted to write about each of these things, as well as things I loved and hated from the game after playing through the game twice. I'm choosing not to review it because as of right now I am too conflicted to garner any sort of cohesive breakdown on the pros and cons, if I never get around to a review consider the opinions of this article to remain true unless otherwise stated.

1) Pre-Release Negativity 
     When Mass Effect 3 was announced I was deeply concerned, coming off the irredeemable pile of trash that was Dragon Age II, was BioWare on track to destroy another one of its beloved franchises. The quick turnaround in announcement to release was especially frightening since so many cutbacks had been made to DAII that it barely resembled a finished product, with around five environments repurposed again and again to conserve on time and money. As time went on a Multiplayer mode became the only talking point for ME3 and I feared again resources were being wasted on an unnecessary and largely wanted feature. Add to this a new character that rightfully became mocked as the newest member of The Jersey Shore and you had a game that seemed to be moving further away from its original premise. And while some of those fear were quelled some reared their head or so I believe *see Things I Hated*.

2) Slightly Less Pre-Release Negativity / Day One DLC
     Day One DLC is nothing new and the entire argument of "I payed for the game why don't I get all the content" is so self-entitled its incredible, you are not important to a businessman you are a number and you are vastly outnumbered by those who differ in opinion. If you are incensed at the idea of paying for more content, THEN DON'T PAY FOR IT, speak with your wallet instead of a completely superfluous online petition, it's the only language businesses understand. There are files that contain content from the DLC on the disc, that is so the DLC is better integrated with your experience instead of it feeling tacked on with no impact. Finally game development is something most people dont understand, people seem to forget that hundreds of people work tirelessly for months and even years to deliver the experience most people so quickly dismiss. In a typical development cycle a game is completed around 2-3 months before the games release in that time the vast majority of the team is sitting on their hands with nothing to do, until the game finished certification, it is in this time when the developer focus on future DLC, and yes future can be Day One since its still 2-3 months of development time before the game is released.

3) Mass Effect 3- The Ending
     So.... WTF was that huh. Aside from the obvious plot holes, cheap patched together ending, or complete disregard of any and all choices made from throughout all three Mass Effect games that ending was piss poor to put it lightly. I would love to have a retrospective on the development of Mass Effect 3, it would be fascinating to see what on Earth motivated them to reach so far up their collective asses and pull out this unmitigated atrocity they somehow gathered the balls to call "a satisfying conclusion". FUCK YOU. The reason the ending angers me is because it was so clearly unthought. There is literally a Nobel Prize winning thesis the length Barack Obama's cock that tells of the completely absurd number of problems with this ending. I will use what little intellect I have to shine a light on just a  few glaring problems.

• If the Reaper are synthetic why would they wipe out all life, why not just organic. If the Catalyst *cunt child* controls the Reapers "Who the fuck is he"? If chaos is inevitable why not wipe out all life bar-none, why allow for the cycle to continue indefinitely? The Reapers don't actually stop chaos, in fact they allow it to continue with a 50,000 year intermission.
• If you spent literally THREE GAMES subsiding the wars between entire species doesn't the Catalyst realize the cycle can be avoided. By the end of my game, the Geth were fighting alongside the Quarians, the Krogan, Turians and Salarians had settled their differences. Cerebrus was destroyed, Synthetic including the Geth and EDI learned to love and became self-thinking. 
• Why develop a game in-which you make galaxy spanning decisions if they never materialize in any fashion. Save the council; well they still hate you/ Save the Rachni Queen; save her again/ Rewrite the Heretics; they still side with the Reapers
• Didn't BioWare realize that every ending dooms the entire galaxy. Every ending destorys the Mass Relays, which in this universe means space flight is impossible, leaving species stranded on other planets, planets they cannot survive on. Turians cannot eat human food, they all die. Quarians can't assimilate to their environment, they all die. In some endings all synthetic life dies, AI's, Geth, anyone with cybernetic implants. 
• Where the hell is the Normandy and why were they flying through a mass relay when shit was going down
• Why spend an entire game collecting war assets if they don't influence the conclusion in any way. Why not run towards the blue beam with nothing but a shaved head and a dick in your hands. 

4) Things I Loved 

It may seem surprising but I did actually like parts of the game. I really enjoyed that the game had so many incredibly kick-ass and oftentimes moving scenes. Seems like everyone with any real importance gets at least one moment to shine before the end. Characters like Jack, Grunt, Legion, Thane are given a sort of last hurrah before the end. Because of the impact these characters have had on each individual player their choices and motivations matter, they are more human and relatable than any videogame character has ever been. Mordin Solus had a dark past that haunted him, he justifies his actions as something that had to be done, but he has never been able to live with himself since. His sacrifice in Mass Effect 3 has meaning because as players we have become friends with him, we understand why he does what he does and feel genuine sympathy for this tortured man who only wants to redeem himself.

But character moments and deaths aren't the only great thing about Mass Effect 3 the game looks absolutely stunning, every environment is lavishly detailed even when BioWare clearly cut some corners with 2D backgrounds. As you visit every homeworld which appropriately echoes the individual species culture and aesthetic the vistas and details are nothing short of breathtaking. The final confrontation between the Qurians and the Geth is especially strong as you fight on the very planet the Qurains have been fighting to get back to for centuries. The fate of these two races is brought to a heated and highly emotional peak as the Geth strive to become sentient and the Qurains try to reclaim their home. No matter the outcome its incredibly powerful and meaningful after three games of build-up.

The game is also a lot more dynamic, better animation and camera cuts between cutscene and action. Less awkward conversations between two characters standing still, instead characters move around and articulate. Even on the ship characters interact with each other with no input on your part, Vega can oftentimes be found cooking "webos fritos" in the dinning hall, it makes the ship and its passengers feel more natural. Characters also move around to meet up with one another or just to get out of someones way it all adds to the camaraderie and realism. 

My main takeaway from Mass Effect 3 of the things that I enjoyed boil down to moments. Poignant, Cheer Inducing, Heart-Breaking, Cathartic, Incredibly Moving moments. Mass Effect 3 excels above all else in these moments, they are perfectly crafted with attention given to cuts, score, lighting, facial expression and countless more seemingly menial things. When these moments are onscreen you will undoubtedly think to yourself "this is the most perfectly crafted videogame in history". These moments are magical, and that's not hyperbole, this universe and the characters that inhabit it are near and dear to our hearts and this final entry in their stories is significant in a more meaningful way than that word could ever convey.

5) Things I Hated 

Everything that isn't those incredible moments I mentioned above. The pacing in this game is totally fucked, the galaxy is supposed to be ending and your running errands on the Citadel, multiple time you are told how long its been since you last Earth -in shambles by the way- and it seems inconceivable any life could have survived the Reapers extensive extermination process. One minute you are saving a species from extinction the next your helping extract civilians from a Cerberus occupied facility, aren't decent soldiers for this kind of stuff. How am I supposed to believe the Reapers are a threat if I can stop and talk to the bartender and dance the night away. Don't get me wrong, all of these things are awesome, and in a lot of cases define the Mass Effect experience, but their at odds with the direness of the story. Either make the Reaper less of a threat so walking around hanging with your bros isn't jarring or more seamlessly integrate those side-missions and "dates" into the ever looming threat of the Reapers.

The N7 missions are bullshit, repurposed multiplayer maps does not a compelling experience make. Side-Missions with very very few exceptions are also .... bullshit, why is Shepard eavesdropping and then conveniently coming across *enter name here* artifact. It's a waste of time and completely devoid of entertainment. What happened to solving investigations, helping a Quarian on his pilgrimage, shaking down a corrupt merchant, or simply helping a quell an argument. All NPC interactions make Shepard seem like Michael Cera, quietly walking up and awkwardly interrupting a conversation to make a single sentence input and then walk away as the poor passerby ask themselves, "who the hell was that". 

Lastly why is there so much less interactive dialogue. I remember coming back from a mission in Mass Effect 2 and having lengthy and involved discussion with each of my crew and squad members based on the previous mission. Now I walk up to Liara, Garrus or Vega and I get a half-assed response to an unspoken question, "That shit on Palaven was messed up, huh" yes, yes it was, now weep into my shoulder and confess your true feelings. There was just a strange disconnect with characters this time around, rooms in the Normandy were never occupied and left it feeling lacking. The game also had a lot of automated dialogue, Shepard seemed to have minutes upon minutes of dialogue between characters with little to no dialogue wheel choice from you. And it oftentimes felt like the dialogue wheel was missing more options with the game predominately only offering the upper right (paragon ) and lower right (renegade) option.

Edit- The dream sequence were pretty terrible too.

Edit 2 - That blue scanning room is annoying.

IN CONCLUSION 

Mass Effect 3 is an incredible game and a game everyone who has played the previous entry's should play. You simply cannot miss the opportunity to wrap up longtime plots and see off some of the greatest characters in all of videogame history. Mass Effect 3 struggles to recover from the ambition of its predecessor, there was simply no way to accommodate for every conceivable permutation somebody could have by the end of that game and so favorite characters are short shrifted. The games pace is nullified by an assumed intergalactic threat that seem to patiently wait for you to find NPC #13's Heat Stabilizer. But man when Mass Effect 3 goes for intense emotional drama, they fucking nail it. BioWare crafted characters the likes of which will likely not be seen for quite some time, these characters existed beyond their roles in the game, they had lives with regrets and accomplishments they had lived and loved and they meant something, to the bitter end. BioWare also irrefutably bring closure to some of the most compelling stories in a videogame with the Geth/Quarian War, the cure of the Genophage, the Alliance of every species in the galaxy to fight a single foe. It's a shame most of these things are squandered by the ending, but its the journey that counts. A bad ending does not make for a bad game, and there are plenty of things to look back on with immense satisfaction in each entry in the series.